Author Archives: Emdashes

Well, If You Must Know, That Was Abominable

David Marc Fischer at Blog About Town outdoes himself once again with his second analysis of the 100 drawings and captions thus far in the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest.
In his first review of the cartoonists and cartoons in the contest so far, he concluded that “the first hundred cartoons in the Caption Contest, drawn mainly by men, tend to depict male, light-skinned, and apparently heterosexual ‘protagonists’ in work and home situations. However, in the bedroom scenarios, the ‘protagonists’ tend to be female.”
In this update, DMF goes on to, as he writes, “offer what contestants will probably value most: information about what makes a winner.” The results may amaze you! (Amusingly, as he reports, “The most common first name among winners is David [4] with Bob/Robert/Rob also adding up to 4.” Are you writing to the unconscious of the editor and cartoon editor, you clever entrants?) Read on.
Meanwhile, over at the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, there’s an interview with Charles “Sandy” Sommer, a retired Ralston-Purina executive, whose caption “It’s a thongbird” is one of the finalists this week. For instant gratification as you wait for the results, read our in-depth Q. and A. with winner #100, David Kempler, as conscientious and serious a fellow as he is winsomely (and darkly) funny, and generous cartoonist Mick Stevens.

Dept. of Welcome Baskets: Ryan Lizza Joins The New Yorker

A warm Emdashes welcome to Ryan Lizza, who, on August 1 becomes The New Yorker‘s new Washington Correspondent.
Lizza comes to the magazine from The New Republic (some of his recent articles), where he has been a political correspondent since 1998, most recently as a senior editor. As David Remnick announced today, Lizza will cover Washington, national politics, and the 2008 Presidential campaign. —John Bucher

O Caption! My Caption! Winner #100, the Cartoonist, Dark Humor, & the Ark

The hundredth New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest is now past, but the Emdashes bloodhounds, just as the trail was falling cold, picked up the winner’s scent. In a gathering-momentum tradition, the victor sat down with assiduous Canadian intern John Bucher to discuss his win.
Congratulations to David Kempler, of Island Park, New York, for winning Cartoon Caption Contest #100—a drawing of a tourist couple marooned on Noah’s Ark—with the line, “Don’t tell Noah about the vasectomy.” This week, an additional treat: commentary from the cartoonist himself, Mick Stevens. The bolded questions are for David, and so it probably works best if you read the slanty portions, which are Mick’s, in a Wonder Years-style voiceover. —JB
It wasn’t clear to me until this last, much closer scrutiny that it was in fact a woman saying to a man, “Don’t tell Noah about the vasectomy.” I’d assumed it was one of those nonplussed-looking elephants. How did you first take in this drawing, and how did the caption come to you?
First off, you’re right that it’s often difficult to tell who is actually doing the talking in New Yorker cartoons, and I’ve actually submitted two entries in the past that had the wrong person talking.
Says Mick: I can see why you didn’t see right away that it was the woman speaking. I should have emphasized her a bit more. Cartoons depend on getting the visual across right away, otherwise the joke gets blunted some.
As to how this caption came to me, I’m not really sure. I do know that how I used to construct my entries didn’t seem to work so a few weeks before this particular cartoon I decided to try and think like a New Yorker staff member. After playing with that idiotic notion for a while I dropped the strategy and just went back to think what I thought was funny. I think I just got lucky.
Says Mick: The idea for the cartoon came to me this way: I started with the “Noah’s Ark” cliché, then started thinking about the various animal couples on the boat and what they might say to one another. Then I thought about the fact that humans are animals, too, and imagined them as tourists who had booked a cruise and somehow ended up there.
I think David’s caption is a good one. In most cases, those drawings are done specifically for the contest, but this one originally had a caption. The editors decided to drop mine and use the drawing by itself. (My original one: “Next time, I book the cruise.”)

Your caption, David, is a riff on the sacred and the profane—or, at least, the Biblical and the genital. What is your religious temperament, generally, and what are your feelings about the Noah’s Ark story?
I was raised Jewish and am the only child of two Holocaust survivors. I think I have a morbid sense of humor. Whether or not that is because I am a child of Holocaust survivors is impossible to determine. I also participate in a celebrity death pool, where I have enjoyed some success. They get about 1,200 entries for each game, and I have won a couple of times and been in the money a few other times.
I’m not religious but, as I get older, I reflect more upon my family history. This past March I was invited to Germany by a woman who started a program that features an artist who puts plaques outside the buildings from which people were taken to concentration camps. They unveiled four plaques—for my mother’s mother, father, sister, and brother. My mother did not attend because she felt it would have been too upsetting. It was a good decision on her part.
I view the Noah’s Ark story the same way I view all of the Bible. To me, it’s a somewhat honest attempt to represent history. Unfortunately, it suffers from the same problems you encounter playing a game of telephone, where one person reads a passage to a second person, who repeats it from memory to another, to another, etc. Eventually the story veers pretty far away from the original.
Let’s pursue the connection between morbidity and humor a bit more. What impact, if any, did your parents’ being Holocaust survivors have on your sense of humor? Do they share your sense of humor? And what is black humor, exactly?
Hard to say their impact on my sense of humor: I’ve never experienced life as another person or in different circumstances. Maybe I understand better than some how quickly our lives can be snuffed out. My father is dead. He was always clowning around but not in a morbid way. His brother shared my sense of humor. My mother is a much more serious person than my father was.
Black humor is comedy with an underlying uneasy feeling that tells you perhaps you shouldn’t be laughing. One of my favorite examples of black humor is the movie Happiness. One of the plot’s central points concerns child molestation. I thought it was brilliant—but both times I saw it in a theater about a third of the audience walked out, offended.
What is your first memory of reading The New Yorker? What are three pieces that stand out for you?
I don’t remember my first reading, but it was probably in college. Top three is tough and I’m sure I’ll forget something, but, off the top of my head, I would have to go with the Richard Preston piece about Ebola that ended up as the book The Hot Zone—one of the most terrifying things I have ever read. My favorite cover is the Art Spiegelman silhouette of the World Trade Center after 9/11. My favorite reading is anything by Hendrik Hertzberg.
I can’t help but ask a person who confesses a morbid sense of humor: What will your tombstone read? Or, if you prefer, what song will you have played at your funeral?
Never thought about my tombstone, but perhaps I should. Final song would be either something by David Bowie or Elvis Costello. “The Angels Wanna Wear My Red Shoes” pops into my mind at the moment.

***

Other Emdashes caption-contest interviews:

  • Robert Gray, winner #106 (“Have you considered writing this story in the third monkey rather than the first monkey?”)
  • David Wilkner, winner #99 (“I’d like to get your arrow count down.”)
  • Richard Hine, winner #98 (“When you’re finished here, Spencer, we’ll need you on the bridge-to-nowhere project.”)
  • Carl Gable, winner #40 (“Hmm. What rhymes with layoffs?”)
  • T.C. Boyle, winner #29 (“And in this section it appears that you have not only alienated voters but actually infected them, too.”)
  • Adam Szymkowicz (“Shut up, Bob, everyone knows your parrot’s a clip-on”), winner #27, and cartoonist Drew Dernavich interview each other in three parts: One, Clip-On Parrots and Doppelgangers; Two, Adam and Drew, Pt. Two; Three, Clip-On Parrots’ Revenge
  • Evan Butterfield, winner #15 (“Well, it’s a lovely gesture, but I still think we should start seeing other people.”)
  • Jan Richardson, winner #8 (“He’s the cutest little thing, and when you get tired of him you just flush him down the toilet.”)
  • Roy Futterman, winner #1 (“More important, however, is what I learned about myself.”)

Register: Titled Newsbreaks, 4Q83

In which Martin, who’s now abroad and provoking envy among his colleagues here at Emdashes, combines his fondness for newsbreaks—those witty clippings at the end of the occasional New Yorker column—his voracity for research and documentation, and his nimble fingers with the Complete New Yorker DVDs (from which, as Martin points out, newsbreaks are absent). A math student of whom it was once said “She has somehow arrived at the correct solutions, yet does not appear to know how to graph the trigonometric functions we studied this term,” I’m still somewhat fuzzy about what all the figures mean (though I know at least one of them is a fiscal quarter), but I know that you, sage readers, actually made it to Calculus and won’t have any trouble. —EG
ANTICLIMAX DEPARTMENT 11/28 55, 12/5 208
BLOCK THAT METAPHOR! 10/17 49, 10/24 157, 11/21 138, 11/28 147, 12/5 152
BRAVE NEW WORLD DEPARTMENT 10/24 103, 11/28 190
CLEAR DAYS ON THE EDUCATIONAL SCENE 12/5 177
CONSTABULARY NOTES FROM ALL OVER 11/14 168, 12/19 131
DEPARTMENT OF DELICACY 11/21 49
DEPT. OF HIGHER EDUCATION 12/12 167
DEPT. OF UTTER CONFUSION 10/17 167
DON’T GIVE IT A SECOND THOUGHT DEPARTMENT 12/19 127
FAMOUS “WHAT IF”S OF HISTORY 11/21 213
FULLER EXPLANATION DEPT. 12/26 53
HIGHER MATHEMATICS DEPT. 10/17 192
HOW’S THAT AGAIN? DEPARTMENT 10/10 123, 10/17 56, 10/31 133, 11/14 187, 11/21 164, 11/28 104, 12/19 142
IT’S ABOUT TIME DEPARTMENT 12/26 68
LIFE IN CALIFORNIA 11/28 51, 12/19 47
LIFE IN THE FAST LANE 12/26 39
LIFE IN TORONTO 10/17 92
LYRICAL PROSE DEPARTMENT 12/19 121
NEATEST TRICK OF THE WEEK 10/24 48, 10/31 139, 11/14 209, 11/28 167, 12/5 183
NO COMMENT DEPARTMENT 11/7 152, 12/12 188
PERISH THE THOUGHT DEPT. 10/10 153
RAISED EYEBROWS DEPARTMENT 11/7 112, 12/12 148
SENTENCES WE HATED TO COME TO THE END OF 11/28 177
SOCIAL NOTES FROM ALL OVER 10/3 103, 10/10 161, 10/31 144, 11/21 219, 12/12 154, 12/26 43
THAT’S TOO BAD DEPARTMENT 10/17 177
THE MYSTERIOUS EAST 12/19 123
THE OMNIPOTENT WHOM 11/7 47
THERE’LL ALWAYS BE AN ENGLAND 10/3 132, 12/12 159, 12/26 57
THESE CHANGING TIMES 10/24 53
UH-HUH DEPARTMENT 10/31 125
WE DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT DEPARTMENT 10/3 108
WORDS OF ONE SYLLABLE DEPT. 11/14 139, 11/28 168, 12/12 74

* Fascinating, sprawling Robert Penn Warren poem in 11/14 issue. I dare someone to tackle it.
* Brilliant Al Ross cartoon about literary snobbery in 11/21 issue.
* Engrossing profile on five brothers who are all New York City building superintendents, in 10/24 issue. No other magazine does this sort of thing so well.
* Janet Malcolm on Jeffrey Masson pops up in this quarter. Uh-oh.
* George Steiner on George Orwell looks interesting, 12/12 issue.

7.02.07 Issue: Subtexting, “Sicko,” and a Dandy Handey

Each week, the Emdashes staff dons a big foam hand to identify those aspects of last week’s issue that most closely resemble a walk-off home run. Happy Fourth!
The spot illustration, by Rachel Domm, for John Lahr’s review of Sarah Ruhl’s production of Eurydice was remarkable. It reminded me a bit of the work of Tara McPherson, only without that artist’s painful Goth overtones. —MCS
To me, “George Packer” means stern, lucid commentary on war and politics. This weekend, though, he pricked me with humor, and three times on a shuddering ferry to Vancouver Island I laughed out loud at this depiction of what a powerful New York contingent (Clinton, Giuliani, and Bloomberg) might mean for the next Presidential election.

“[It] would so thoroughly explode the Sun Belt’s lock on the White House that an entirely new kind of politics might be possible, in which evolution is not an issue, no one has to pretend to like pork rinds, and the past tense of “drag” is “dragged.”

Also: a few chuckles from Jack Handey’s delightfully cruel nature documentary: “The monkey is shot by a poacher and falls from giraffe.” Golden. —JB

There’s so much pressure to like monkey-themed Shouts, but I did anyway. I haven’t enjoyed nature documentaries the way I used to ever since I read a powerful essay somewhere about how these blithe, leafy programs lull us into a dangerously cheerful stupor, in which we forget that the earth is already a goner, because look, an antelope, a toucan, and an ibiza! I think it was a Harper’s Reading; I keep trying to cite it, so I’ll have to look at their archive. On the other hand, if it weren’t for nature documentaries, etc., would we care about that godforsaken polar bear in An Inconvenient Truth in the first place?

Anyway, some of my favorite stories: I liked seeing Ken Auletta throw caution to the wind and just write the heck out of a piece on Rupert Murdoch. To accompany it, there’s an absorbing and fun interview with Auletta by Blake Eskin for the new “New Yorker Out Loud” podcast; it’s nice to hear the Nextbook veteran interviewing again. At least in my experience, it’s faster and easier to subscribe to this and the other (fiction, New Yorker Conference, etc.) podcasts directly through iTunes, but my computer’s been wonky lately, so it might just be me.

Also notably top-notch: Margaret Talbot on lie-detecting machines; Maxim Biller’s sad, beautiful, and beautifully short story “The Mahogany Elephant” (would that I could have read it a decade ago and avoided a heap of foolishness, but that’s how it crumbles, cookie-wise); Joan Acocella proving once again how good her book reviewing can be; Joyce Carol Oates writing intelligently and well about Stephen L. Carter; John Updike on a revisionist history of the Depression—the book section is uniformly good this week. The cover is also a subtle, satisfying event. Where does one buy those bulbs? I’ll mail one to the first person to tell me. —EG

Winner David Kempler, We Are Looking for You

With the friendliest intentions, of course! If a search engine has happened to bring you to this location, please know that we are aching to interview you for intern John Bucher’s recurring feature, “Oh Caption! My Caption!” Please get in touch with him here. Congratulations and happy Fourth! And happy Canada Day, too—though of course Canadians have nothing to be happy about, since at present, they can’t enter the Caption Contest. When will a Canadian taste the kind of glory that David Kempler, winner #100, is basking in right now at his home in Island Park? I will continue to ask this question!

6.25.07 Issue: Diana, Wrinklers, and Dulse-Gatherers

Each week, the Emdashes staff puts the blue ribbons on the aspects of the last issue that most reminded us of Wilbur, the good-hearted, unprejudiced pig radiantly bathed in buttermilk.
I’d like to reassure anyone alarmed by Calvin Trillin’s tale of drugs, arson, and violence in Nova Scotia that we Canadians are a peaceable people, with universal health care, level roads, and excellent hockey players. Trillin is ascending my list of favorite writers. I often flash back to moments from his tales of Alice, his late wife; and “swayve dogs,” from his Letter about Frenchy’s, a Maritime secondhand clothier, makes me smile weekly.
J.D. Salinger poked his head into my last last POTI entry, and I can’t look at those photos of soaring trestles in David Owen’s “The Anti-Gravity Men” without thinking of Salinger’s Raise High the Roof Beams, Carpenters. Check out that welder! —JB
Speaking of Trillin, I’d like to thank Laura Buckley for introducing the phrase “asshole issues” to my vocabulary. It was one of those lacunae one only recognizes in the act of filling it. It will get a lot of use. —MCS
I’ve already noted my pleasure in Lou Romano’s far from hacklike romantic taxi cover, Nancy Franklin’s incisive column (a Sopranos-mad friend says it’s the best thing she’s read on the show closer), and the excellent writing on architecture and engineering by the underappreciated Owen.
Like John, I admired Trillin’s taut, beautifully told story of island strife, and the review of Tina Brown’s Princess Diana book by John Lanchester was notably sensible; I also appreciated its dignified lack of tittle-tattle about both Brown (which was the clear choice under the circumstances) and Diana (which was admirable; I’m tired of hearing her defined by her taste in couture). John Lahr always makes my list. He is a giant. —EG

Jeffrey Goldberg Crosses (to) The Atlantic

From Women’s Wear Daily (when did they start being such a major source of media news, I wonder?):

MOVING ON: Not many correspondents leave the hallowed halls of The New Yorker, but the Condé Nast weekly has just lost a big one: Jeffrey Goldberg, its Washington correspondent, who’s leaving to join the cerebral literati’s other favorite mag, The Atlantic, as a national correspondent. The last departure at this level of The New Yorker was two years ago. Goldberg will assume his new position later this summer and will be based in The Atlantic’s Washington office. He’d been with The New Yorker since 2000, covering foreign policy and the conflict in the Middle East. His work earned him several journalism honors, including a National Magazine Award for Reporting in 2003 for his writings on Islamic terrorism. “[New Yorker editor] David Remnick is terrific — everybody there is terrific — but The Atlantic made me a very attractive offer,” Goldberg told WWD. “[Atlantic editor] James Bennet is a good friend of mine and The Atlantic is early in the process of reimagining themselves. That’s interesting to me.” Goldberg added that he likely would travel back to the Middle East more so than in recent years at The New Yorker.
In addition to his seven years at The New Yorker, Goldberg is author of the memoir “Prisoners: A Muslim and a Jew Across the Middle East Divide,” and covered the Middle East for The New York Times Magazine, where he and Bennet worked together, and the Mafia for New York magazine. He also has written for Slate, The Jerusalem Post and The Washington Post. And his departure at The New Yorker will no doubt set off a scramble among every journalist in the nation’s capital to nab the spot. — Stephanie D. Smith

TNY on Trib’s List, a Cartoon Breakdown, and Those Tricky Invasive Weeds

My first daily newspaper, the Chicago Tribune, calls The New Yorker one of its 50 favorite magazines:

Katherine Boo’s story on the closing of one of the worst high schools in Colorado wasn’t just challenging and moving, it was absolutely riveting – and a reminder that, if other magazines have more bells and whistles, the New Yorker has, pound for pound, more quality writing and reporting than anyone around.

Someone I met at a party recently was saying that Boo deserves a big prize. I agree.
But the most exciting thing in meta-New Yorkerland this week is the grand analysis of all 100 caption-contest cartoons in the magazine thus far, by (it shouldn’t surprise you) the tireless David Marc Fischer at Blog About Town. He’s broken down the cartoons by subject, gender (of “protagonist” and cartoonist), scenario, geographical location, and everything else you can imagine. It’s a truly awesome achievement, and I can’t wait to read part two.
Meanwhile, did you know that cartoonist Mick Stevens has a blog? In his thoughtful posts, he provides a welcome and sober look at the cartoon-making process, which doesn’t always end triumphantly.
Finally, wunderkind big-band leader and jazz pianist Solomon Douglas, who unexpectedly swung through town this week, just turned me on to Language Log, a linguistics blog, and what’s the first thing I noticed? A second look at that recent newsbreak about invasive weeds. You remember:

NO COMMENT DEPARTMENT
From the San Francisco Chronicle.
With California Invasive Weeds Awareness Week just around the corner (July 17-23), there are two words every Californian should know: yellow star thistle.

Funny, right? Language Log’s Arnold Zwicky thought there might be more to this thorny issue, and he did some sound sleuthing into how an unthinking copy edit may have led to the horticultural (and orthographical) gaffe. Read on.